​

Hey Reader,

Over 10 years ago, in my early twenties, I remember going to one of my university's parties and feeling simply a little bit lost about what I wanted to do with my life and what was supposed to be my life's purpose.

I remember calling my mom to see if they could pick me up as I was not really having a good time. When my dad arrived to pick me up, I think he could tell something was wrong. When he asked, I remember telling him that I felt like everyone else was enjoying themselves, like they knew what they wanted to do with their lives, and that I just felt confused by what I was supposed to do and honestly, like I was 'behind' everyone else.

My dad, being the storyteller he is, proceeded to tell me the story of where the secret to happiness is hidden.

This is exactly how I remember him telling me the story:

The "secret" to where happiness is hidden

My dad knew what he was doing when he told me this story all those years ago, as it has stuck with me all these years.

Any time I feel unhappy now, I remind myself that the true happiness I'm often looking for outside (and not finding) is already within me. All I have to do is connect with that part of myself I know is hidden inside.

So, if you have been looking for happiness and you feel like no matter what you do or accomplish, you still don't find it, maybe consider that it is already (and has always been) INSIDE you.

A practical tip to help you be happier:

Just knowing that happiness is found inside us doesn't always make it easier to find. That's why I have found that this practical exercise always helps me to connect with the happiness that I know is within me.

But I know you have been happy (or at least happier) at different moments in your life.

So, on those moments of life when you feel unhappy or unsatisfied with life, I want you to remember the moments when you felt a lot happier. Whenever you do this, make sure to ask yourself these questions, dig deep, and write down the answers:

• What activities were you often doing during these moments of your life?
• What brought joy to your life on a daily, consistent basis when you have felt happier?
• How was your daily routine during this happier time? Were you waking up or going to bed at an earlier time, were you going to the gym or working out consistently, were you spending time outdoors or out of the house, were you spending more time with your family and friends?
• What places were you constantly visiting? What people were you constantly seeing and interacting with?
• What is something you enjoyed doing as a kid or when you were younger that you would like to try again?
• When you think back to your childhood, what is something that brought you a lot of joy?
• If you could learn anything new, what would you learn? What do you 'desire' to experience right now in your life?

Remember: You already have the map within yourself to finding your own inner happiness. Nobody can really tell you the specific things that will make you happier but you.

By remembering and really connecting to those moments in your life when you have felt happier or experienced happiness, you will find that there is a recipe to it, and you already know it. Now, you need to implement it again in your life.

"How to be more consistent?"

Whenever you listen to any stories of success in any area of life, you hear about the power of consistency.

"Just be more consistent", people always say, but nobody ever tells you "How to be more consistent?".

Here are a few practical strategies that will help you become more consistent in any area of your life.

1. Make it a part of your lifestyle.

It's easier to do something every day than to do it just a few days. When you make doing something a part of your lifestyle, of your daily routine, it becomes a part of your identity and evidence of who you are now.

Whatever you want to be more consistent on, make it a part of your daily schedule.

2. Give yourself grace about the amount.

When your focus is on making something a part of your lifestyle and daily routine, you need to give yourself grace on the amount you are able to do in any single day.

This simply means two things:

1. Push yourself to take the action and do the thing, daily.

2. Lose the focus on how much or for how long you do it.

This way of looking at consistency allows you to adapt to the unpredictable nature of life without breaking the streak that helps you build a new identity.

If your goal is to make exercise a habit in your life and you want to be consistent in working out, make sure to have:

• A "Perfect Case Scenario", where you have a full hour to work out at a gym or take an in-person fitness class.
• A "Plan B Case Scenario", where you do a 30 minute home workout video.
• A "Worst Case Scenario", which may involve doing squats or push-ups for 5 minutes and taking a short walk around your neighborhood after dinner.

3. Apply the Daily 1% Rule

The daily "1% improvement principle popularized by James Clear in his book "Atomic Habits", states that making small, consistent improvements daily compounds to big results over time. Anything above zero compounds, so even a 1% improvement can create a big difference in your life over time.

If you improve by 1% each day for a year, you'll be 37 times better by the end of the year.

For reference, 1% of your day is roughly around 15 minutes of your day, so if you want to be more consistent in any specific area, focus on doing it for 15 minutes daily (you can always increase the amount whenever you feel like it or whenever your schedule allows it). "Grace in the amount, push on the action."

4. Use Your Mornings

Discipline and willpower decrease throughout the day.

As our energy wanes, so does our motivation to do anything, especially anything new that takes effort. That's why it will always be easier to do anything that takes energy first thing in the morning than after a full day of work and responsibilities. Early mornings also tend to be the time we have the most control over in our days, as it is the time less likely to get thrown off course by the unexpected events that life sometimes is made of.

In the beginning, for the first 2-3 weeks, when you are just starting to build the new habit and create consistency, plan to do the new action early in the morning, and it will be more likely that you do it.

5. Set Yourself Up For Success

Use the power of the environment and set yourself up for success.

It is more likely that you will do anything if the environment is set up and prep for it.

• It is more likely you will work out at a gym or on a yoga mat than in your kitchen.
• It is more likely you will write at your desk or in a silent room than in your bed.
• It is more likely you will study in a library or your school than in a restaurant.

Your environment has the power to change your focus and make you more prone to do something.

Make sure you set yourself up for success by preparing beforehand the space, the clothes, and the tools/equipment you will need to do the daily action you want to be more consistent at.

6. Start small and build from there

A mistake we have all made when trying to create a new habit is to go from nothing (zero) to everything (a hundred).

When we are trying to do things we have never done, we think we need to make drastic changes and commit to 2-3 hours of doing the new activity. To make it worse, we often try to take on multiple changes at the same time.

This is a recipe for failure.

Instead, focus on making only one change at a time. Then, start 'small' (set yourself up for success by starting with something that feels "doable" and "easy") and slowly build from there.

• Want to become a morning person? Start by going to bed and waking up 15 minutes earlier than your regular schedule for one week. Then, progressively each week, increase the time until you get to your desired wake-up time.
• Want to learn a new skill? Start by studying or reading about that topic for 5 minutes daily for one week. Then, add 5 minutes each week until you get to a schedule that works for you and that you can consistently keep up.
• Want to build a habit of strength training but have never done it before? Commit to doing it for 15 minutes daily for the first week. Then, increase it to 20 minutes daily for a week, then 25 minutes daily, and so on, until you accomplish a schedule that works for you.

When you are creating lifestyle changes, focus on one new habit at a time until it starts to feel like a regular part of your days.

You don't change your life in one day. But you can slowly change your days, and that, ultimately, is what will change your life.

7. Use the power of accountability.

This is something I use a lot more now than I used to.

A few years ago, I believed that I could change my life by myself without needing to tell anyone or talk about it. The reality, though, is that working on yourself and accomplishing new goals can be very lonely.

As you try new things, build new habits, and pursue new interests, oftentimes, it may feel like you are losing your friends because you are on a different path.

This is a normal part of growth. But it's hard doing things alone for an extended period of time. That's why finding even just one person who is on a similar path as you can make such a big difference to keep going the distance.

Find one friend who is working towards similar goals and looking to also be consistent to be your accountability partner, and make it a point to check in with your progress on a daily or weekly basis.

Something as simple as creating an "Accountability Chat", where you text each other once you have completed your action for the day, can create a whole difference in how you show up and how consistent you are with something.

Disclaimer: When working on building accountability, don't compare yourself and your results to other people's results. It's human to want to do this, but comparing our journey to others is usually a waste of our time and energy that could be better used to take action. If you are going to compare anything, be sure not to compare just your results. Instead, when you are comparing, be a lot more specific and compare approaches, strategies, and the manner of doing things as a way to use comparison as a learning tool to improve your own approach and strategies.

A small tip: If you feel like you don't know anyone who could be your accountability partner, connect with people online who have the same goals or are on the same journey as you (look up Facebook groups, online forums and classes, and any related social media groups), or even work with an online coach or trainer who can support you in your journey.

'Just' Show Up... Keep Showing Up

Consistency isn't about being perfect.

Inevitably, there are days that you are going to miss. There will be days when nothing goes according to plan. Days where you aren't able to even do your "Worst Case Scenario" plan. That's simply life.

The key to bouncing back is to stop punishing yourself for the misses.

Stop trying to "make up" for it or to punish yourself for what you didn't do, and instead, get back to showing up.

Focus on continuing to show up.

Show up when it doesn't feel easy. Show up when you don't feel like it. Show up when you aren't seeing results. Show up when you are uncertain of the recompense. Show up when nobody's watching. Show up messy.

But just show up.

Because you will become the person who keeps on showing up. You will become the person who is able to show up even when everything else feels uncertain.

That is what will change your life.

Quote on your personal power:

You have immense agency and power to change the direction of your life and to shape your own destiny and identity at any moment in time.

You are not the things that happened to you. You are always what you choose to become.

Never forget that.

​(Share this on X/Twitter)​

On procrastination

When you choose to procrastinate on a project or task or you choose to skip the gym, you are not simply being "lazy". You are choosing the desires of your current self over the needs of your future self. You are saying, "I don't care about the problems of the future because I'm not there". But the problems of "future you" are yours too. The more you can recognize that and bridge the mental gap between "present you" and "future you", the more you can choose actions that benefit you long-term, as opposed to only choosing what you want in the moment.

The next time you are trying to decide what path to take, don't ask yourself what you want to do at the moment. Instead, ask yourself what would benefit the most to "future you". Think about the "after-feeling" more than you think about the "before-feeling".

Comedian Jerry Seinfeld nailed it here:

Which path do you take? The one that benefits "future you" or the one that only thinks about "present you"?

Remember: The choice is yours. Choose what makes your life better in the long term.

[POLL] What is something you are struggling with right now?

​

Love creating your mind one day at a time? Forward this to a friend so they can get in on the action and sign up below. Subscribe to The Created Mind Thank you for reading and sharing, Jenny ​​​​

​