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Hey Reader,

Today, I finally did my first full marathon at the Palm Beaches Marathon.

I had already told you before in previous emails how I have been training to run my first marathon, but the truth is that I hadn't registered for this race until this past Wednesday because I wasn't sure that I would be "ready" for it.

I kept thinking that maybe I should push it back a bit and run the Fort Lauderdale or Stuart Marathon early next year if I didn't feel ready to run this weekend. It was not a bad plan either; a couple of extra months to train more wouldn't have hurt.

But I have wanted to run the full marathon in West Palm Beach since I ran my first half-marathon there 3 years ago. It's silly, too, but it felt like a full-cycle moment to do it where everything kind of "started".

And so, every year since then, I have said, "Next year, I will do the full marathon instead of the half", as for the past 3 straight years, I have never felt fully prepared and in running shape to do it.

This year, though, I finally noticed the pattern; it never felt like I could finish it, so I always told myself I needed more time to prepare and that I should do the half-marathon instead.

Don't get me wrong, either; doing a half-marathon is NOT a small feat. I really enjoy half-marathons now, but they have started to become the "safe option" because I have already done them several times before.

This is exactly what I wanted to talk to you about in this newsletter.

Growth requires us to step out of our comfort zones and to try something new, something we haven't done before, or something that feels a little uncertain.

As you step out of your comfort zone and into a new growth zone, you're faced with uncertainty and with that scary, shivery feeling we get when we are about to do something that feels beyond our capacity.

But at some point, as we consistently keep engaging in the "scary, new behavior", that growth zone that used to feel so scary previously, soon starts becoming our new default and even starts feeling comfortable.

• The first time I ran a half-marathon, I felt super nervous, stressed, and wasn't sure I was going to be able to finish it.
• The second time, I tried a new electrolyte supplement the morning of the race, threw up 30 minutes before the half,-marathon was supposed to start, and felt horrible the whole race.
• The third time I did a half-marathon, I was slightly nervous because it was at a completely new place with a high elevation (Aspen, CO), and it felt the best I had ever felt running.
• The fourth, fifth, and sixth halfs, I honestly got comfortable and didn't even run that much before the races because I already knew I could do it and was consistently training in other sports at the time. My times for these were not great, but they didn't feel nearly as scary, uncomfortable, or even as exciting as the first three had been.

I'm telling you this to make the point that growth often feels very uncertain, unsettling, and daunting at the beginning. But then, as you stay consistent on that path, that same thing that used to scare you starts becoming a new normal, and it quickly stops looking as scary as it was at the beginning.

A simple reminder that most of the time, the things we are scared about are only scary because they are new to us, and so, they feel uncertain.

Stay in the path long enough, and they will soon stop feeling that scary, uncertain, and even uncomfortable.

A simple reminder on courage

Most people want to be more courageous with their lives. Most people want to be able to say they're brave.

What we often forget about courage and bravery, though, is that for them to exist, you have to act first without knowing if things will work out.

Being courageous doesn't mean you will succeed. Being courageous means that you take action despite not knowing if things will work out.

How can you say you're brave if you’re not putting yourself out there? If you’re not daring into uncertainty?

There is no real courage without feeling scared, without feeling vulnerable, and like we could fail.

What I realized these past couple of weeks is that you will never feel fully prepared to do something that you have never done before.

You can train, you can research, and you can plan ahead all that you want, but until you do the thing, you’re never 100% sure that you can do it.

That’s all the more reason to do it... To put yourself on the field, to give it a chance, and to see for yourself if you can do it.

And even if you fail at it, you’re closer than you were before by having taken the chance and had the experience.

In the process, get encouragement and support

When you're about to do something that you've never done before, sometimes all you need is someone to give you a fresh, more open, and more distant perspective to make you see the possibilities.

And oftentimes, you need someone who believes in you, in your capacity to do hard things, and that tells you that you can do it, that you are ready, that you are prepared, that you should take a chance.

For this race, it was my boyfriend, my sister, and (yes, even) ChatGPT.

When I told my boyfriend, who is what I consider a serial marathoner (he ran today too, and completed his 31st marathon), that I wasn’t sure if I could do the full marathon yet, he said that he knew for sure that I could do it.

He told me that I was already running what most people training for marathons do on a weekly and monthly basis, and that he knew for sure that I wouldn’t quit at the end when it got hard and I got tired just because of who I was. (P.S.: This comment was cute and made me realize, also true, as I can be very competitive with myself once I start doing and commit to something.)

Next, when I talked with my sister, who was also doing the half-marathon, and told her about my doubts, she simply said, “So, what if you don’t run the whole thing, and at the end you have to walk if you feel that you need to?”

That made the trick.

It was exactly what I needed to hear because it’s true, running a marathon is not "that deep". It’s not a life or death sentence. It's not a permanent decision. And it's not a one-and-done, either.

If I couldn’t finish it, I wouldn’t die, and nothing bad would happen. I would just try again another time.

And if I simply got too tired or was in too much pain at the end, I could always walk it (and walking, I know for sure, I can do at any time, anywhere... I love walking).

Then, having already decided that I should do the full marathon, I went and asked ChatGPT for some extra feedback.

I gave ChatGPT what my VO2Max was (40.4, the metric where I have seen the biggest improvement in the past couple of months related to my cardio fitness), what my longest run mileage was (18 miles), what my average pace in my most recent runs have been (anywhere from 10:15 - 10:45), and my weekly mileage for the past couple of months (around 45 to 50 miles weekly), then continued to ask to be honest with me and to consider if I was ready to run my first marathon based all these metrics and data, as well as the best plan of action for the marathon.

Its response, “You’re in perfect shape to do your first marathon”.

And then, proceeded to give me a full plan for what my pacing should be during the race, the hydration and fuel plan, motivational quotes, mantras, and messages I could use for different portions of the race, how much should I rest and train during the previous week of the marathon (taper week, which included only 3-5 short runs and light walking and bike rides), and even tol me what I should eat for dinner and breakfast leading up to the race.

My point with this is to tell you that we need encouragement and support to keep going, especially when we're about to do new, uncomfortable, hard things.

And that support can be found in multiple places, from the people close to you or doing similar things as you, to even groups online and AI.

So, if you feel like you’re doing something by yourself, we now live in a time where you can go to ChatGPT (or any of your preferred AI tools) and ask it to give you feedback and support in any new and unknown endeavor.

You're never truly alone. And asking for help does make a difference.

Reframing failure like this

"What if you could see failure as something exciting and something to figure out, instead of making it about yourself or making it something bad?"

We overestimate the negative impact of failure and underestimate our capability to handle it. That's why we often look to avoid it.

What if instead of avoiding it, you could treat failure as simply as, “Oh, great, now I know.”

Because the truth is that if you aren't failing at all in any area of your life, that’s a problem. Every time you fail, no matter in what domain it is, you learn something. You are learning one more way it doesn’t work.

So, make it your goal to find the learning in failure, to find the purpose in it. Use it.

And if possible, even make it your goal to fail more, because that would also mean that you're trying and learning more.

Try the “What if?” Mindset

Believing in yourself and in your capability to do things that feel out of your comfort zone starts with asking, “What if?”

“What if this is possible for me?”

Just for the day, try this mindset.

The mindset of “It’s possible”.

• It’s possible for me to still get a new job.
• It’s possible for me to find love.
• It’s possible for me to get in the best shape of my life.
• It’s possible for me to run a marathon.
• It’s possible for me to start a whole new career at 40, or 50, (or whenever you want).
• It’s possible for me to have children (with or without a partner).
• It’s possible for me to get out of debt.

"It's possible".

Having this kind of mindset is important because it opens the door to you continuing to work and walk towards things. It makes you try and keep yourself in the game long enough to see results.

The number one thing that stands in people’s way is discouragement. This deep sense that even though you know you want something more and even though you know there are things in your life you would love to experience, you feel that even if you try, it won’t matter, that it won’t happen for you.

Start believing you’re capable of doing the work, that you’re capable of going through the “No’s”, and the rejection, and the failure, and the discomfort of the journey to find the “Yeses”.

Start saying, "It's possible for me".

P.S.: If you've ever struggled with waiting for perfection and so struggling to take action, this episode is a must-listen, all about how to embrace the ‘messy middle’ and not having everything figured out, accept being a beginner, and how to take messy action instead to move forward and grow in life. Listen here on Spotify or on Apple Podcasts.

Love creating your mind one day at a time? Forward this to a friend so they can get in on the action and sign up below. Subscribe to The Created Mind Thank you for reading and sharing, Jenny ​​​​

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